“… a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.”
(Proverbs 29:15)
First, I only use the word violation of minors just so you know what I am referring to because we have lumped a large plethora of people and circumstance into one characterising it as one and the same. Second, I’m sorry to disagree with you that what we call a violation of minors is sometimes a consensual act. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not justifying adults involved by any means and I hate it as much as anyone else, but to be able to get down to the root of a problem, dissect it, and thoroughly understand it, we need to be very honest with ourselves. It is only when we understand it fully we can truly give a solution that is both effective and lasting.
I’ve seen many people try to address the issue of the violation of minors but they’re just tickling the surface of the problem rather than breaking through it with a mattock. From all I’ve heard it seems we do not understand the problem as a people and so are administering a wrong solution to it. Like a doctor that does not diagnose a patient’s ailment before administering drugs or other medical processes to the patient. This is bound to be disastrous.
The Nigerian Senate has been doing a great job in proposing and enacting stiffer punishments for crimes such as abortion and violation of minors, among other worthy deeds by them. That is great and nothing better can be expected from them from the legislative angle. However, these laws alone can’t stop such atrocious acts. Why? Because we don’t seem to understand what exactly we are trying to tackle.
Abortion for example is murder. It is criminalised in Nigerian law. But people still do abortion steadily and sometimes even without hiding it. People know Cynthia has committed abortion but nothing is done to Cynthia despite the law criminalising what she just did. I saw a video where some girls answered an altar call, knelt before the altar and were confessing how many abortions they’ve done. I wondered as I watched it, “are these people not confessing crimes?” Imagine if they came out like that to start confessing the countless people, including their siblings, they’ve murdered in cold blood. What would be our response? But because abortion is not seen as murder it stops at just making laws with no practical enforcements and so doesn’t deter people from committing them in any way.
However, abortion is not our discussion today. Our focus is on the violation of minors. First we shall look at the wrong notions people have about the “violation” of minors then we shall proceed to talk on how to prevent its occurrence effectively.
The Wrong Notion That Minors Are Innocent
“Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.”
(Psalm 51:5)
“They were children of fools, yea, children of base men: they were viler than the earth.”
(Job 30:8)
People often assume that children are innocent compared to adults but this is an erroneous assumption and there is no scriptural or logical basis for this. A child of six can be more corrupt than an adult of forty. The thing that makes people innocent or corrupt is not age but exposure. Isaac in the Bible, the son of godly Abraham, was forty years old and so innocent was he that he never thought of marriage even at that age. It was after the death of his mother his father had to take the initiative to look for a wife for him. He wasn’t exposed to corrupt content and so was innocent even at forty. Today however, you’d observe corrupt habits and tendencies in children as young as four. Why? Exposure to corrupt contents.
Many parents are really failing in protecting their children from corrupt influence. I had a little smart camera which I gave to children to take photos as a reward when they complete reading a book and pass the test I gave them. When however one of the children took the camera she video-recorded the things they were watching in their house. Even I as an adult would never, as long as I live in this flesh, have a justifiable reason to set such a thing before my eyes. Yet they were watching it with their father lying by on a cushion with his eyeglasses on while he read a newspaper. He was unbothered and unperturbed as his children were watching such a thing. I noticed all the children in that house, ranging from three to ten years of age, were already corrupt and had corrupt tendencies.
In another house where I went to buy something once, I observed through the curtain that the children were watching women in bikinis. In shock I said to their mother, “is this not women in bikinis that these children are watching?” She then asked them to change the station. It was with much difficulty that the children were made to change the channel.
Then I’d hear someone argue that children are innocent. That is absolutely an error. And because when innocence is lost the only thing that can keep someone from corrupt acts is virtue. By this I refer to the knowledge, wisdom, will, and strength to choose the right over the evil. Adults possessing knowledge are more likely to be virtuous than children who lack knowledge. An adult because of his understanding would weigh many things before he acts, therefore after much thought he has a lot of considerations to warn him off wrong actions. For example if an adult is tempted to an illicit sexual activity he would think of his reputation, he would think of the health risk, he would think of the risk of getting someone pregnant, he would think of the immorality of the act, he would think of the eternal consequences, and think of a host of other things before he acts. These things are a lot and if one of them cannot dissuade him from the act they all collectively may do the work. But a child has little or no knowledge of these things. Provided mummy and daddy won’t know, they’re good.
The Wrong Notion That Minors Don’t Want To Be Sexually Used
“Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child…”
(Proverbs 22:15)
“They were children of fools, yea, children of base men: they were viler than the earth.”
(Job 30:8)
The next error is the error of assuming that minors don’t want to be sexually used. This error is bound to affect every judgment we arrive at on the issue of violation of minors. The truth is that every living creature, both plants and animals, want to be sexually used. In humans it requires abstinence to keep from it not the surrender to nature. The idea that human young are different from other creation is an egregious error. It is an unfounded notion and how people even came about it makes me wonder.
I have perceived that while at a very young age of between zero and two children tend to have some innate moral code they came to the world with. I once had a colleague who came to work with her little child of about two or three and when in trying to point things out to her on her screen I rested my hand on her desk, the boy came to me without a word and took my hands off her desk. In that innate morality he had he couldn’t stand seeing someone that close to his mother and resting a hand on her desk. If what I observed was common to every child then I’d say they have a strong sense of morality and propriety. The sense of morality and propriety belongs to their very early years, but when we say minor, we refer to a young person all the way up to eighteen years of age, when in the world of today they’re usually thoroughly corrupt at that age, yet are tagged still as minors as though they are innocent.
There is another young child who, when he was about two or three years old, also seemed to have a sense of morality and propriety. One day another little girl of about seven came to him and was pressing herself on him while whispering something into his ears. With a frowning and complaining face the boy of about two or three kept pushing her away, but she kept coming back. Wondering what was going on I went closer to hear what she was whispering into his ears without their noticing me and heard her urging him, “kiss me, kiss me, kiss me.” I was shocked and drove her away. Such a girl was a minor by definition but she was already pressing herself on a little boy trying to get him to kiss her. I’ve rebuked the same girl a number of times for her inappropriate way of playing with little boys, embracing them from the back, and having cheek to cheek contact. And all these in full view of people. Who knows what would be happening when no one is watching. Do we call her innocent? Do we say such doesn’t want to be sexually used? Well we may not say that she definitely wants to be SEXUALLY used, but she definitely wants to be INAPPROPRIATELY used.
The little boy at the time, still had that innate morality and sense of propriety, wouldn’t yield to the foolish plea of a seven year old “minor.” However as we speak the boy is about four now and he too has started seeking romance and to be with girls, showing signs of having many foolish desires already. So even at about four he’s lost that innate sense of morality and propriety.
At another time I went to say hello to my mum. As I passed by her street I saw two girls of about eight and nine cuddling by a fence just by the road, though the road was a bit lonely. Not many people pass there in numbers. As they cuddled with their silly muffled giggles one was reaching her hands under the skirt of the other trying to take off her underwear and she was trying to restrain her from doing it. Even while I came closer to where they were they continued their silly play, either they didn’t even notice me or they didn’t care. When I stopped and fixed my gaze on them with shock on my face, they stopped and looked away trying to avoid looking at me, yet they remained in each other’s embrace. Yet those are minors that don’t want to be sexually used.
I spoke to a man who told me of his childhood experience with a nanny. This nanny sexually abused all of them who were in her care. Contrary to what people say that these children don’t want to be sexually used, as per being angelic eunuchs, they looked forward to the abuse so much that the nanny used the abuse as a reward system to make them behave. If you did what she wanted she let you in to get abused, but if you didn’t she will keep you out. He said for this reason whatever thing she asked them to do they did with haste and how she wanted lest they should be left out. Now here are children, innocent children, that don’t want to be sexually used working hard to get qualified to be abused.
Lastly, I too had an experience of inappropriate behaviour when I was a child. I loved football from my childhood and you can be sure to find me anywhere I can play football. So it appears that there was a little girl that had had her attention on me a long time and noticed how much I loved football. I should be about six or seven years old then. So one day I was passing by her house on my way home and she called from the front of her house asking me if I wanted to play football and showed me a ball as she spoke. I immediately consented and we set little posts. So I said to her that to make the teams more balanced and since I am good at football I will play alone while she and her little brother (who I should think was one or two years of age) should make the other team, but she refused. She said both of us would be on one team while her little brother would be alone on the other. I wondered how exactly this would work but chose to try it out. So to get the game started I just kicked the ball and into the post it went. The little boy didn’t even know what we were all about, not to mention trying to stop the ball or playing the game with us. So when the ball went into the goalpost she leaped on me and gave me a firm hug. I got confused as I didn’t know what that was all about, then she told me that is how Kanu and Okocha used to celebrate goals. I went there in innocence to play football, but when I realised this was what her football game was all about I started going there everyday to play football, no more in innocence. It was not long though before it all stopped. One day I went there and didn’t see her. I looked for her around but she was nowhere to be found. Then I went to the back of her house and I met her with her mother and elder brother. Both of them looked at me with angry faces as if they were waiting for me. They gave me the warning of my life to keep off from their daughter and I kept off.
So, what does this all tell us? The idea that children are innocent or don’t want to be sexually used just because they’re children is wrong. Once they’re exposed to certain corrupting influences they have a very strong sexual urge and must be restrained and protected by their guardians. As I said they’re prone to committing greater evils because of their lack of knowledge. What two adult women would sit by the road trying to take off each other’s underwear not even caring when someone is passing by? What adult would be pressing herself on a male demanding to be kissed? The lack of knowledge makes them prone to even greater evils than adults.
It is on this ground of lack of knowledge that the concept under law called “doli incapax” is formed. The idea that children can’t understand the nature or consequences of their choices. Not that they cannot make wrong choices. There has been no rational consideration that considers children to be unable to do evil. The girl trying to take off her friend’s underwear by the road obviously lacks knowledge of the nature or consequences of her action, but the action is evil and depraved all the same. And minors in particular are drawn to evil for this same lack of knowledge.
Before proceeding to the next error it is worthy to note that females, including little girls, are often the one spearheading such evil things. This can be seen in the accounts I’ve given. I’ve noticed that by nature male children are more interested in activities such as rolling tires, running around, and kicking balls around. Girls are the ones who are very aggressive in these corrupt practices and lead boys astray. This points to another common error that always tends to see males as aggressors. This may be true, but when it comes to minors, females are often the aggressors and are sometimes even aggressive towards male adults.
The Wrong Notion That Minors Can’t Give Consent
“For my people is foolish, they have not known me; they are sottish children, and they have none understanding: they are wise to do evil, but to do good they have no knowledge.”
(Jeremiah 4:22)
This follows from other things I’ve said so far. When I read of the conversation that occurred while our senators deliberated on giving stiffer punishment to those who defile minors, I read of how one of the senators said, and I quote, “a minor is a child who cannot give consent…” From what we’ve talked about so far and if anyone would make their observation too, it is easy to see how wrong that notion is. That is a wrong notion and it is not peculiar to him. It’s a widespread notion. Young people can give well thought out consent to these things and go in search of it themselves. As said, what matters is not age but exposure to corrupt contents or corrupt company.
Seeing these things are so, it is necessary to consider these when drawing up laws. I need to stress here again that I’m not against stiff punishments for offenders but to really get to put an end to this evil we need to really understand the bitter truth about it, accept it, and then we can put a stop to it.
The Errors Of The Solutions We Have
“He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.”
(Proverbs 18:13)
Because people have held to all manner of wrong notions about minors and their ways, the solutions they offer to the problem have naturally been very faulty and problematic. Some of the things they call solutions are even contributing to and speeding up the corruption in children and eroding and corroding their fragile innocence.
One of the things I find most disturbing is what is called sex education. If you teach children anything about sex it won’t keep them from it, rather you’re exposing them more to what is not meant for them and they’ll go for it. Even if you teach them that it is bad, the only effect of your teaching them that it is bad would have on them is to ensure you who told them are not aware. They’ll hide it from you. That’s all you’ve achieved.
Second, still as a way of doing sex education, people start producing pamphlets or small booklets instructing children that nobody is allowed to touch this or that part of their bodies. When as I have narrated children took the abuse of themselves as a reward and worked for it and looked for it, what effect does all that have in keeping children. I spoke about this in more detail in my free ebook titled, “THE INSTITUTIONS OF THE CHRISTIAN HOME,” which can be downloaded HERE. In that book I also described how children can be safely educated about keeping away from corrupt behaviours without eroding their innocence.
God didn’t give children to parents because he wanted children to govern themselves. All those pamphlets and silly education aimed at helping children to govern themselves is all a heap of rubbish. Children need to be governed. Choices must be made for them in so many things including choices of friends. And that brings us to the next point and the main point of this article.
Parental Protection: The Only Effective Solution
“… a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.”
(Proverbs 29:15)
Having said all this, let’s look at the real solution to bring an end to this evil. The only effective solution is parental protection. When we understand the nature of minors and their proclivity to evil we shall know that not only do they need to be protected from predators, they need to be protected from themselves.
The Bible says, “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child…” (Proverbs 22:15). This foolishness leads them into various forms of evil ranging from seemingly minor evils of dishonesty to even greater ones of sexual depravity. Their foolishness is great but it is a greater foolishness to suppose that these children are wise enough to choose good over evil.
Parents, particularly mothers, must be around their children. If going to school is a must, which because of the manifold evils in the schools of today, I’m beginning to think home schooling is safer, parents should take their children to their schools and bring them back into their own custody. And in their custody nurture their children up to when they are on their own.
Parents need to protect children. It is written, “… a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.” (Proverbs 29:15). When we take a closer look at these things we shall see the damaging effect feminism and the tradition that teaches women to neglect their children in the effort to be accomplished career women is having on our children. But that shall be another day’s topic.
Laws To Force A Stop To Parental Negligence
“The law of the wise is a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death.”
(Proverbs 13:14)
The ruinous practice of sexual immorality with minors is alarming and leading us slowly and steadily towards destruction. As the text above says, “The law of the wise is a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death.” (Proverbs 13:14). We need the law of the wise to save us from this destruction. The wise is first well informed, understands the nature of the things he’s delving into, before he can make wise decisions about it. It is the laws of such people that can deliver us from the approaching destruction. The laws being passed already are great, giving the widely held notion. It is the widely held notion that needs to change and then the laws be revisited.
The idea that children are innocent has hopefully been debunked. Their proclivity to evil has been affirmed. The need for parents to properly govern and protect them has also been affirmed. Those making laws would do well to take these things into careful consideration. I therefore make the following recommendations.
Stiff punishment must be meted out to violators of minors which has been proposed already, but minors must also be punished when certain consideration has been made to confirm that they were complicit in the act. Their age is not a justification. We don’t just rule out their crimes based on the erroneous notion that they can’t be complicit to evil.
Deuteronomy 22:23-27 gives us an example of this on the care to find out if a damsel is complicit to an act. If she cried for help and no one heard her, then the man only shall be punished with death. However if she did not cry for help then is she complicit. In our case we must also devise means of determining whether or not the minor was complicit. Where they are complicit the minor too must have his share of justice meted out to him or her too.
Since minors in their early years can’t understand the nature or consequences of their choices, then must they be under the guardianship of their parents. Where parents are found negligent they must also be served with their own punishment under law. They are to be held accountable for their children’s act and for their own failure to protect their children.
The effect of this legal framework is that violators of minors would be deterred by such laws when in place. Parents too would be careful to ensure their children are kept from corrupt contents, peers, and influence, knowing that should these things lead their children to being complicit to wicked conducts their age would not absolve them. Parents too would be careful to play their duties as parents knowing that in the case of failure they shall be held accountable for negligence.
If this is done, the law would not only serve as a deterrent to violators of minors but shall go to the root of the problem to ensure that circumstances that lead to this evil are completely avoided.
One may say the good wishes of parents is enough to ensure they keep their young safe. But I hope we shall remember that I gave an account of how parents let their children watch women in bikinis and watch other corrupt contents that cannot be justified on any grounds for anyone of any age to set before their eyes. Forgive my saying it but some parents are just down right stupid. If I were to add accounts of the stupidity and stupid negligence of many parents to this already long article, the article would probably be doubled in length. But let it suffice that it is for this reason of costly stupidity of parents that the law ought to step in to make them sit right or punish them where they fail as a deterrent to others.
I’d also like to point out quickly before bringing this article to a close that what should be punishable under law is not just cases of adults with minors, we also need to punish cases of minors with minors. The truth is that what is more common in our societies are cases of minors violating minors. Students sent to school sleeping with each other. This is so endemic and has corrupted our educational system. To be seeking to tackle cases of adults with minors and doing nothing about minors with minors is like, in the words of Christ, straining out a gnat only to swallow a camel. Whereas cases of adults with minors are not more damaging to the wellbeing of minors than the cases of minors with minors. More effort must therefore be put to addressing issues of minors with minors because cases of adults with minors is by far rarer.
Conclusion
“None calleth for justice, nor any pleadeth for truth: they trust in vanity, and speak lies; they conceive mischief, and bring forth iniquity. They hatch cockatrice’ eggs, and weave the spider’s web: he that eateth of their eggs dieth, and that which is crushed breaketh out into a viper.”
(Isaiah 59:4 – 5)
So we have discussed on the fact that children are not as innocent as people claim. Their ignorance makes them more susceptible to evil than adults. They are not angels. Where exposed to corrupt contents or influences they also have sexual cravings at even as early as five. Their ignorance of the nature and consequence of the evil they engage in does not imply that they can’t give consent to it. In fact they can even more easily give consent to evil due to this same lack of knowledge. There are faulty approaches in trying to protect children from abuse which are mainly geared at teaching children to be self-governing whereas God didn’t give children to parents so that children can govern themselves. Parental protection is the only sure way of ensuring children are safe. The law therefore must ensure that violators, the violated (when complicit), and parents (where negligent), must all be punished under law. Failure to do this would be mere tickling the surface and will not get the desired results.
If we have rightly found it right to wade into such matters by law, we must wade in rightly and completely. If there’s an age when punishment is more effective and is more required it is at the same age we consider minor and so absolve from punishment. That notion must therefore be corrected.
Let parents not carry out their duties poorly so much that they can be described as those who conceive mischief, bring forth iniquity, hatch cockatrice eggs that whosoever eats it dies and if you break it it brings forth a viper. Many children fit this description as a result of bad parenting. If you leave them they’ll destroy themselves and harm the society while at it. If you correct them they’ll turn and devour you. It is my prayer that parents will wake up to their duty in governing and protecting their children first from corruption, their own proclivities, and from predators.
It is on this ground that I bring this article to a close. May God Almighty guide us to the right path in solving the problem of this evil, furnishing us with both the wisdom, resolve, and strength to get it done. This I ask in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Prayer: Dear Father, the issue of the violation of minors is a grave evil and very sensitive, and being sensitive it is hard to touch on the issue without being overly sentimental so much as not to think with a rationality needed to solve the problem. Help us to go to the root of the problem and root it out of our societies. Give us wisdom and tact, poise and will, and strength and courage needed to put a perpetual end to it in Jesus’ name. Amen.
